Thoughts Gone. . . . . Reality Lost | |||||||||||||||||
| This page is dedicated to everyone who ever loved me or hated me. Without you I would not be who I am today. | |||||||||||||||||
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I've been thinking about starting an online journal for awhile now. I started to realize that no matter how brutally honest I want to be, the fact that this is on-line means that I can't be. Not completely. There are omissions, subliminal and conscious self-censoring. So, that leaves me with what? I can't write about how I feel, because someone might be offended? Is that what it comes down to? There will moments of nakedness where I've bared a bit of my heart/soul/twisted psyche. And sometimes, I may say stupid things. Things that may not paint me in a positive light. But it's all very selective. This is not because I'm necessarily trying to entertain, it's the act that someone is reading. Some entries -- no one will ever read them. Not unless I did some major editing. There is a certain safety in knowing that some words will remain secrets forever. So, what am I getting at? I don't know. I'm just starting and I've got things to say, dammit. And I don't want to drive readers away. I want perhaps anonymity and honesty. I want the freedom to say whatever I'm thinking, and not have to worry about the potential consequences. I want my cake, eat it too. | ||||||||||||||||
| Recent Entry | |||||||||||||||||
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I've recently rediscovered a treasure from my childhood.�HoHos.�For those of you who don't know, HoHos are tube shaped and chocolate coated cakes wrapped around a creamy filling.�My mother never actual bought them but whenever I went to my grandma's house, she had HoHos a plenty. I was in the store a couple of weeks ago when I saw them.�I was seized by a sudden urge to try them and see if I still liked them.�Yes.�I love HoHos.�Now I find myself having HoHo cravings.�Feeling desperate when there are no HoHos in the house. Bought more HoHos tonight.� I've had two already.�I'm not a chocolate person, you've got to understand, I have the monthly need for chocolate and that's it.�I never eat crap like Twinkies.�Or HoHos.�Not until recently. �And now I'm getting scared.�Each delightful little cake has 130 calories and little or no nutritional benefits.�HoHos are just not something to be taken lightly. Or eaten with abandon.�I've got to get this HoHo monkey off my back or I'm going to be abandoning clothes with waistbands and sleeves to the joy of the chocolate cake wrapped around a creamy filling.�Mmmm.�HoHos. | ||||||||||||||||
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